A Dark Souls Journal #8: “What did that giant mushroom make you do?”

There was no entry for yesterday, as the day was mostly filled with miscellaneous activities. There was some progression, but not much. The majority of it was taking advantage of the glory of finally being able to warp between bonfires.

After defeating the Londo Bros, I found a statue of Gwyn, Lautrec’s loot, and Gwynevere. I’ve heard many jokes about her chest, but if I must be honest, I spent most of the time staring at her face. Is it just me or does she look like Emma Watson? I can’t unsee it. Tell me it’s not just me…

She gave me the Lordvessel, which gave me the ability to bonfire warp. I joined her covenant, just to see what was available. She told me to seek further guidance from Frampt, the weird snake head over at Firelink. Primordial serpent, she says… I don’t trust many snakes. I’m sure he’s on my side, in a matter of speaking, but… this is Dark Souls.

I took advantage of the warping to address loose ends. The monsters in the center of the Painted World turned out somewhat effective for soul grinding. The knight at the end guaranteed a Large Titanite Chunk on each visit. I was talking with a friend on Discord, so I didn’t feel like doing progression. I was basically idling a bit, and I gained some levels out of it.

I returned the Fire Keeper Soul at Firelink Shrine, thus reviving Anastacia. I’d also finally cottoned onto what the Old Witch’s Ring I got at the start of the game was for. I can talk to the Fair Lady now… and I guess she thinks I’m her sister, Quelaag? Who I killed? Hahaha… this is awkward…. I’m :blobsweat:ing over this.

Frampt got extremely excited about the Lordvessel. I’m not going to heavily discuss the fact he took my character into his mouth and dropped her off underground at the Firelink Altar. The Lordvessel is now set in place, thus opening the pathways that were once blocked off by those oh so ‘brilliant lights’. He then took me back up…

Oh, and I fought two fools at some point, I guess. Eat dirt, Jeremiah and… Kirk. I bumped the latter off into the lava below, so I probably missed out on some loot. Although, it was worth the humour, I think. I found a specific door in the Demon Ruins that I was unable to open. I knew what was on the other side, though, and my poison mist killed it… for Solaire. Am I being overly cautious? Probably.

As for today, I found that upgrading my Pyromancy Flame spawned Quelana at Blighttown. Oh, aren’t I wearing some of your clothes!? Her pyromancies are expensive for me right now, though. I could easily grind out the souls to purchase them, but that takes time that I don’t want to spend. So I bought the Crest of Artorias from Andre for 20000 instead.

And now, let us continue on…

7:29PM

I realised that on my first time through Blighttown, I missed an item. I’ve also heard something about a ring in the Depths. I’ve now acquired the Ring of the Evil Eye, as well as… a whip. I have the thorn whip from defeating Jeremiah, but hey, at least now I know where to find one early if I want do some Castlevania cosplay.

7:53PM

I ended up getting a little more souls from the Painted World, and also picked up items from a body I’d noticed over at Anor Londo. I can’t wield the Dragonslayer Greatbow with my stats, so I ended up replenishing my arrows for my longbow. I’ve also picked up the Tiny Being’s Ring from onion friend.

8:15PM

Ran into an enemy on my way past where Anor Londo’s ‘brilliant light’ barrier was. I wasn’t in any state to actually fight the damn thing, so I used a Homeward Bone to get the hell out of there. As it turns out, onion friend Siegmeyer is at Firelink now. He gave me a reward for opening the gate to Sen’s Fortress. He says he’ll be heading below… that can’t end well.

I’m pretty sure now that pyromancer I killed at Blighttown was poor old Laurentius, our pyro friend. I guess this game is going to systematically kill every character I meet, or make me kill them. Hah! Oh, Dark Souls, you’re so funny… I’ve gone and bought supplies off the undead merchants. I’m glad I’m able to afford all this stuff now. I don’t have to worry about the basic essentials anymore.

8:48PM

It was a mistake to teleport from that bonfire I found. I didn’t realise not every bonfire was a warp target. Either way, I’ve made it back. I have no idea how to kill these boars. Hitting them upfront barely hurts, I can’t stab them from the back, and my pyromancies work but they’re less efficient at the task than I would like.

At least they’re dead. Managed to get one stuck somewhere and just kept setting it on fire. There’s a switch on what looks like an elevator here…

9:04PM

The Duke’s Archives, huh. I both love and hate the fact that the caster enemies dance a bunch to buff their allies. It’s such a bizarre sight – it takes me out of it but I kind of like it, too. This area of the archives seems like it could lead to an easy death, but my tried and true tactic of ‘shield up and then back-stab everyone’ has worked out. Sure were a lot of them…

Oh, you can cosplay as a mimic now. That’s hilarious. I’ve also found the Broken Pendant. This looks to be the item I need to access that one DLC. Guess I’d better head back and check it out.

9:32PM

When I see those crystal golems in the distance, they make me think of Chaos from Sonic Adventure. I mean, really. The boss music starts playing in my head almost immediately… even the environment is similar…

I’ve gotten sucked into the DLC realm. What kind of portal was that? Something ate and warped me, I guess? But also not really? At any rate, I sure ended up somewhere, somehow. Found a Sanctuary Guardian, and the fight started out rough. It kept destroying me. Eventually, I figured out a good spot to defend myself and start cutting it up.

I’m really beginning to appreciate Power Within. It’s my kind of ability. Also, it turns out I don’t need to have that rusted ring equipped to traverse the water in this area. Would’ve helped to have known that… oh well. Oolacile Sanctuary looks nice.

9:42PM

I almost attacked this mushroom on sight. Thankfully, I noticed she hadn’t attempted to murder me just yet. Her name is Elizabeth, and she recognises me as having saved Princess Dusk before. Apparently she’s in trouble again, and of course, as the protagonist, it would feel wrong to not help. Snatched away by someone? Hmm…

Apparently an Artorias is around these parts, seeking to help. I’ve heard this person’s name many times, and seen a fair bit of fan-art, I think. This’ll be very interesting. I look forward to learning more about this ‘abyss’ too. Well, knowing this game, I’ll probably end up killing him at some point, aren’t I? Geez…

Isn’t this DLC’s name ‘Artorias of the Abyss’? Uh oh.

Some amount of time later…

Artorias…. Artorias… Artorias, Artorias…. ah, Artorias…

I suppose I’ll talk about the parts of the trip I didn’t end up writing about along the way. I’m not sure how I’m supposed to describe the enemies I met. Weird plant dudes with giant garden scissors and such for weapons. Some straight up giants, I think? They took so long to kill that after a while I just started avoiding them.

Come to think of it, I think they’re considered guardians of some sort. I remember getting some sort of guardian gear. There was a bunch of that found as loot on corpses all over the place, too. Weird purple fog further into the forest, and a deadly drop with no end in sight. Are those both a sign of the ‘abyss’? The blue… liquid? Is that some sort of blood? A dragon popped by at some point, too…

Also met a suspicious man that just makes me think of V for Vendetta. He acts as a shop, and it appears he may come from the same time as me. It would appear we are somehow in the… far past? I suppose that makes sense. Princess Dusk needs saving here, but I picked her clothes off a corpse a couple days ago. He hasn’t done anything yet, but I don’t trust this guy. He rubs me the wrong way, the same way Lautrec did.

Hang on a sec… this guy isn’t Trusty Patches, is he? He is, isn’t he?

Soon after, I reached a fog gate. And there… I found him. I was surprised. I wasn’t expecting to see Artorias until much later into this side adventure. But no, he was right there, and… whew, what a fighter. Ornstein and Smough took me four tries, a total of eight minutes if you only count the time actually doing the encounter.

Artorias… took a really long time. This fight was brutal, but very fun. The only annoying part of it was honestly something that was beginning to bother me the more I played this game. That is the long run it takes to get back to the boss arena. This didn’t bother me earlier on, but eventually the sprint stopped being a part of the challenge. It just took up time, and I always zone out until I make it back to the gate.

I’ve recorded my win, and to be honest, I’m surprised that fight was the one where I beat him. I thought it was one of my sloppier fights… but also, I definitely survived! Another day, we’ll see what’s up with the rest of this place. I wonder how much longer this sequence will go on for…

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